"what a weirdo." - bill's mind
here’s the short convo i had w/ one of my heroes, espn.com sportswriter and author of the new book on basketball, bill simmons (aka the sports guy) at his dc espn zone book signing:
me: i’m one of the many asians who send u annoying yao [ming] analysis e-mails. *sarcastically rocking the yao jersey.
bill: i don’t get a lot of those these days. *smile.
ouch, that was a good one. the man still had it even though he looked ridiculously tired (at 1:30 AM on the day of his book release), was facing an embarrassing book shortage, and had to deal w/ fans w/ a common denominator: smart asses who think they’re funnier than they actually are (like myself).
"laugh, funny white man. laugh at our misfortune." - my mind
but the man still had a book to sell, so he offered his condolences:
bill: i like yao though. he’ll be back. thanks for coming. *smile.
loren: congrats, and have a good night! *giddy.
and here’s the sig:
for those that don’t understand the “chairman yi” reference, allow me to quote one of bill’s columns:
Q: I know it’s pretty obvious, but Yi Jianlian’s nickname has to be “The Chairman,” right? –M. Filion, Montreal
SG: Has to be. There hasn’t been a more effective nickname in years. Not only does it sound like the right nickname for him (“Chairman Yi”), but the joke-trapped-inside-the-joke (during ESPN’s lottery show, there was video of Yi posting up actual chairs and spinning around them for layups) will never stop being funny. And when you think about it, we haven’t been able to call anyone “The Chairman” since Sinatra died. So it’s done — we’re calling Yi “The Chairman.” This meeting is adjourned.
all asian-big-men disses aside, one may wonder why smart ass sports fans would wait 3 hours to pretty much flirt w/ another smart ass sports fan. picture this: early fall 2004 … an asian boy just started law school … has no friends … no fellow smart asses to flirt w/ (and that’s how doods flirt with each other, via sports talk) … stuck in the library by himself on a weekend night … but still laughing his smart ass off to one of bill’s non-sports masterpieces … w/o a care in the world … feeling like there is someone out there who understands the smart ass (lonely ass?) within. a moment like this is why i luv bill simmons.
now i sound like a stalker.
